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MEETINGSThe room was full of people I didn't know. And this was getting seriously unconfortable... On my behalf, at least. I hate these get-togethers my parents are so keen on. I was only trying to find in which table I was supposed to sit. That's another thing! Why the hell can't I sit next to my parents? I'm not the one who wants to socialise! "I'm never getting dragged to this kind of thing again." I grunted.
Table, after table, I was going from one way to another across the room intending to find my place and glue myself to the seat for the rest of the night. "Aha!" I finally spotted my name. Rushing there, I started wondering until when I had to stay there... I sat down on the empty table and glanced at the names of the people who would sit beside me. 'Ryan Harlow'... Never heard of him. I looked to my other side. 'Olivia Matthews' Oh. God. Why. My parents had presented me to the woman earlier. She was such a pain! Always talking gibberish, asking thing
EMPTYI woke up feeling empty, missing something I quite never had.
I got up and carried on with my day wishing for something that didn't make me feel empty but I couldn't think of anything so I gave up. I tried to focus on something else and it worked.
I was happy for the time being but the world seemed to decide that I shouldn't be: insecure as alway, I only needed a few words to eat me up from the inside out. I had been feeling alright, and even daring to like myself a bit more than usual, and any other day, I'd probably laugh it off and push it to the back of my mind to be ignored or forgotten. Today I couldn't do it, and now... now, all I said and felt before means nothing to me. I'm hating myself.
They say 'I can't believe you're always demeaning yourself!'. Well, I can. If everyone else does, why should I believe myself better than whom they see?
I keep going on with my day feeling emptier than before, and now I can't help but focus on that feeling.
I eventually went to bed earl
Long time no see... (fic)
Abigail had gone out of the Academy not as early as she wished. It was the beginning of the weekend and she wanted to get lots of things done. She wandered around the island from shop to shop gathering the things she needed: school supplies that were running short, ingredients for some potions, and get a present for Delilah's upcoming birthday... She had come out of the apothecary full of bags with herbs that should be stored as quickly as possible. Maybe I should go back to the dorm, store this, - she checked the time - and have lunch. After lunch I can come back... And with that in mind she started her way back.
One of the good things the island had, in Abigail's opinion was that everyone knew each other, from inside and outside the Academy. But right now she cursed her bad luck as she saw a familiar face asking for directions to one of the inhabitants of Tea Island. The man was surely telling him how to get to the school grounds... And now he's pointing in my direct
ONCE UPON A TIME"Once upon a time there was a little girl.
This little girl was like many others... Had family, friends and dreams.
This little girl lived happily through every day.
One day, she grew up.
One day, everything changed."
"Yeah, yeah..." She said not too sure what she answered to. Lazily, she got upstairs and locked herself in her room. The dim light reflected her figure on the mirror across the room. It looks like I'm looking to a stranger. The hard truth was she was no longer a little girl and people had expectations. Too high, for my liking. Her parents have expectations.
She walked to her bed and sat down... Being eighteen is too much of a pain in the ass. As she glanced to the pile of homework to do and notes to study, she decided to leave it to the next day. She lied down and intently watched the ceiling: it was full of the drawings she had done through the years... Why the ceiling? Well, the wall
MORE THAN WORDSNothing better to do during in a sunny morning than being at a café, eating chocolate ice-cream with waffles, and working on my PC. Well... I say working but, truth be told, I'm just blogging, spending some time in online gaming, answering e-mails, updating software. Oh! And music, of course. There's not really much things to do since I'm stuck here this summer. Thank God, the owner was nice enough to let me use the Wi-Fi without paying...
"Lynn!" someone called. I sat up straight, suprised by hearing my name, and looked around. Damn it! Not him. I turned to the PC screen and adjust the headphones, wishing he would walk away. "Lynn? It's you isn't it?" he said again, only this time he was right beside me. I nodded to acknowledge his presence but not for once I tore my eyes from the screen in front of me. I kept typing like nothing had happened until- Wait! I didn't invite you to sit here! I am not amused! He tried to get me to talk... Again. "Do you rem
WHERE IS HOME?"Stop!" I was running towards her. She was about to get on her bike. I needed to scream louder. "I said STOP!" That made her look. When I got to her I took her hands in mine. "Please don't go..."
"But, I shouldn't... I have to go, eventually." She replied.
It was the truth. "I know, but don't go today." I softened my grip on her hands. "I can't make you stay, if you don't want to. However, if you have the tiniest hope that we can get through this, don't go... Don't make me let you go." I pleaded.
She closed her eyes and shook her head. "I- I don't know. I'm so confused and I need some time to figure something out." She opened her eyes and looked me straight in the eye. "I'm going to my parents' for now. They have been living there since I remember... There, everything is familiar and that is what I need now."
I was taken aback. "You know you can count on me, right?" She nodded but before she could speak I continued. "Then stay... You know better than to lie to yourself: you're not goin
100 Reasons to Stay AliveCute animals that make you go, "Kawaii!"The part of the charger you put your foot on while you're derping on the laptop.Pencils so sharp you can possibly murder an undesirable specimen. (I don't suggest that, but you can.)Clear, blue skies.Putting on the headphones after a long day.Realizing you don't have any homework.The feeling of spring after winter."EMERGENCY MESSAGE: Due to extreme weather conditions, all school activities and administrative offices have been closed for today."Dry towels.Belting out your favorite song in the shower.Cute guys.Maybe cute girls.Or maybe both. I don't know your preferences.The sense of accomplishment.Looking in the mirror and trying out your "sexy" pose.Going on DeviantArt to find your messages chock-full of activity notifications.When you're in a radically good mood so you don't have a care in the world.Hilarious videos.Seeing a picture of something that doesn't usually have a face having a face.When your crush smiles at you.Being weird with your BF
Markiplier - Draw My Life.Markiplier Draw My Life
“Hello Everybody! Markiplier here and thank you guys so much for being with me through a 1000 videos! It’s hard to even imagine how we’ve gotten from this point, and I REALLY wanted to do something special for the 1000 subscriber milestone, er, not a 1000 subscriber- 1000 VIDEO milestone, and, I think this video is really gonna explain to you guys how I got from point A to point B, and how YOU guys have helped change my life because, um, these things are really important to me because, they tell how I became the person that I am, and I really do appreciate you guys for sticking with me. So, HERE WE GO!!!”
“I was born on an island in the middle of the Pacific Ocean called O’ahu, which is the third largest island of Hawaii, and home to the city of Honolulu where I was born on a military base. My dad was a career army man, and he had been in the army 23 years before he retired, and appar
Maybe This Is My Last GoodbyeI just have something to say and that is that I can not but
I have tried to get ahead for myself
But I can not
Every time I feel most miserable
Whenever I feel like not worth it to go ahead
I've tried everything
But they just look at me as a useless, stupid good for nothing like a monster
So to go ahead if, just they tell me my faults in the face
They say I have to open my wings and fly towards my destination where I belong
I try to fly, but my wings are broken
And without wings I can not fly to my destination, and if I not go to my destination I have nothing
And if I have nothing to go ahead
Maybe my destiny is in heaven, where there is no evil, sadness or mental illness
Stream of ConsciousnessSteam of Consciousness
Second grade must seem like limbo now. I was a naïve kid. I didn’t do anything in class unless told to. Being the new girl, no one associated with me unless told to by Sister Raphael. I didn’t care though, I just did what I was told, did my work, at lunch at my desk when everyone sat with each other, did more work, and then went home to do homework and play with my toys. The boys were all right; I worked well enough with them. Didn’t do anything outright. The girls went out of their way to ignore me, talk about me, but I didn’t notice. It was normal to do so, I thought. I knew right from wrong like how they said it in the Bible; I knew they were being bad. But if it affected me at all, I was soon distracted by something else. I just went with the motions.
-- (my name), come here.
Sister Raphael waved me to her desk. I was nervous at first, shivers going up and down my body and my heart jumping, but when I sat down, we ate together, an
Today My Hands Reek of Doctor Office SoapBecause I frantically washed my hands in the back room
Because I’m one anxious little fuck when it comes to needles and
Crying children in the hallways and rooms where the walls are paper thin
Because I nearly pass out when needles are stuck into my arm several times
Because no one can ever find a goddamned vein the first time
Trying to calm myself as the doctor comes back in and the first words out of my mouth are
“So what are some good anxiety medications these days?”
a letter to her My darling sunshine,
I know that we're about 1000 miles apart, but my heart feels tied to yours and I can't seem to let you go. My heart tells me that you're my soul mate, that you're my other half, that you're supposed to be loved by me and I by you. Age is just a number. I know that. In your Valentine's Day card, you told me to believe in us, to believe that one day we'll be together forever. I can't wait until that day!
Recently, you suggested we take a break because our distance is too big for you... I told you that'd be okay, I told you that I could wait for 4 more years (seeing as that's how many years of school I have left). You still call me your lovely pet names for me: Babe, darling, deary, and my favorite - your shooting star. You still tell me that you love me, and I tell you that I love you more. I do believe in us, I do believe that some day soon, we'll be together forever.
You, my dear, are my best friend... And I'm yours, you told me so yourself. I won't let you g
La Voce Toaif there is a hardness in the heart
it must be broken
if there are words inside untold
they must be spoken
if there is a candle burning at the shrine
it must burn down,
until the very last drop of wax is spent
this hope will have no ground
wherever i turn
wherever i spin
these are the words
of the dance we're in
if there is sadness welling at the throat
the tears must run
as raindrops fill the ocean
it must be released and sung
if there are voices silenced in the darkness
louder they'll shout
the crowds will take the streets
their anger must be let out
wherever i turn
wherever i spin
and these are the words
of the times we're in
la voce toa nu l'hai timire
la voca toa falla sentire
la voce toa nu l'hai timire
la voca toa famme sentire
My Father's Last Poem The Night Before He DiedMy Father's Last Poem
My mother held my sobbing father one night
He begged her not to put him into a nursing home.
He wanted to die in the home he built himself for her.
It's the least she could have done.
He had been taken via ambulance without him even knowing where they were taking him. He must have been so frightened, this kindest man on the face of the earth.
Images burn, I swear they burn starting in the brain,
from there going wild into the deepest darkest part of your soul.
I see my father in the nursing home making a gallant attempt to spoon the liquid broth
they called soup into his mouth.
Off to the side is a mushy bowl of fruit gone soft.
His milk looks curdled, it can't taste good.
But my father never complains, so paints on his face the fake of a smile
He thinks we don't sense his pain so we can't feel it, he was wrong about both.
Life with him has always been that way, I remember no other.
After Daddy passed I found my mother crying.
My son had stayed until the amb
WHAT LIES BENEATH...Some days I wish not to be the one who's always happy.
Sometimes I wish not to be the one who always wins the fight.
I wish not to lie about how I really feel.
I wish not to smile when all I want is to yell, kick or punch.
Why is it so hard? I think I have no longer the ability to show my true feelings. Maybe I don't know how to feel anymore. All is left is sadness, anger, pain and happiness. Nothing more, nothing less.
I can't bring myself to trust easily people around me... Even the ones I trust the most aren't allowed to know me. I don't let them.
All I wanted was someone... Just someone to see right through me. See the loneliness, the insecurity, the fear.
Some days I wish I had someone whom I trusted.
Sometimes I wish that one person saw what lies beneath my smile.
I wish for someone who trusts me and who I trust.
I wish for a person to hug me and tell me that is okay for me to yell if I want. To cry. To hug back.
That person who knows how I really feel and is by my side.
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Lilyas has dedicated herself to making our community a brighter place with her vibrant artwork and infectious enthusiasm for interacting with others in our community. It has certainly paid off, as many deviants flock to her page on a daily basis to let her know how much of an inspiration she is. We absolutely agree, and couldn't let all that hard work go without recognition, so it's with great pride that we bestow the Deviousness Award for March 2014, to ... Read More