Some days I wish not to be the one who's always happy.
Sometimes I wish not to be the one who always wins the fight.
I wish not to lie about how I really feel.
I wish not to smile when all I want is to yell, kick or punch.
Why is it so hard? I think I have no longer the ability to show my true feelings. Maybe I don't know how to feel anymore. All is left is sadness, anger, pain and happiness. Nothing more, nothing less.
I can't bring myself to trust easily people around me... Even the ones I trust the most aren't allowed to know me. I don't let them.
All I wanted was someone... Just someone to see right through me. See the loneliness, the insecurity, the fear.
Some days I wish I had someone whom I trusted.
Sometimes I wish that one person saw what lies beneath my smile.
I wish for someone who trusts me and who I trust.
I wish for a person to hug me and tell me that is okay for me to yell if I want. To cry. To hug back.
That person who knows how I really feel and is by my side.
The one I wish to meet. The one I wish to know and trust. The one I wish to love.
Where are you?